Rediscoveries & Childhood Essays

Hello again, friends! Long time no see. A lot has happened since I last posted something on here, with the most recent big thing being that I graduated cum laude with mathematics and Chinese majors and a music performance minor from Carleton College last month! It’s hard to believe that I’m all done with undergrad—it probably won’t sink in until the leaves start changing colors and the freshness of fall is back. 

I graduated from Carleton College on June 8th! Thank you to my family, friends, professors, and everyone who has supported me on this journey.
I graduated from Carleton College on June 8th! Thank you to my family, friends, professors, and everyone who has supported me on this journey.
With my teacher and pipa master, Gao Hong, at the MPR dinner.
With my teacher and pipa master, Gao Hong, at the MPR dinner.
At the North American Bear Center in Ely, MN.
At the North American Bear Center in Ely, MN.

Since then, I’ve been reflecting on the past and dreaming about the future, all while soaking in my present life at home. Here, I participate in a book club, play pickleball with my old and new friends, work on a home remodeling project, go on walks with friends, help the family business, and read. I fell back in love with reading for fun, which is something that I didn’t expect to say—I thought that I had been doing that in college since I still read regularly outside of what was required, but reading for fun truly requires that mindset of, you know, fun. This summer has been a time for rediscovering small pleasures, which I’m grateful for. During this time, I’ve also been able to go on a few day trips to visit friends, attended and performed at a Minnesota Public Radio board dinner (this was made possible because of the support of everyone who helped me win the inaugural Karin Larson YourClassical MPR Prize!), and explored parts of Minnesota that I haven’t before. 

But back to my life in the small, rural Minnesotan town I call home. Moving back meant making my childhood bedroom feel like a home again, and that included digging through my childhood things. Oh, how different I feel now, looking back at all of it! We don’t realize how much we’ve changed until we step back and look at the past, huh? I found my seventh-grade Language Arts journal, my most treasured possession for a long time, and I vividly recall how much I loved Ms. Campbell’s class—the poetry unit, comma week, reading time, monthly journals…all of it! While going through my journal, I found a short story I don’t remember writing, which intrigued me. I don’t know if I took inspiration from a Chinese children’s story (my parents tell me that it reminds them of a story they can’t place) or something else. Nevertheless, I think that it would be interesting to share it here. The person who wrote that piece is so different from who I am now, and not just in terms of writing quality. I believe writing mirrors the soul, offering insights into our world at different times. As such, I think it’s so meaningful to revisit old journal entries to appreciate how far we’ve come and the parts of ourselves that we’ve maybe forgotten or put aside. 

So, here’s the story, which I titled The Sun and the Moon

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, an elderly man was asked a simple question by a random stranger. 

“Which do you appreciate more, the sun or the moon?”

The man replied earnestly, “The moon.”

Upon hearing this answer, a look of curiosity and surprised horror crossed the stranger’s face. He stared at the elderly man with his mouth open and eyes wide in shock. Why was he so surprised? It was because the answer he always received was, “The sun.” Those who said that reasoned that the sun brought light to the world and helped us get more done in a day. 

So the eager man asked in an inquiring voice, “Why?”

And the old man explained why.

“When I was a child, I heard a story that happened a couple of years ago. There was a girl, around fourteen, who got into a big fight with her poor mom. She decided to run away, so off she went into the dark woods where she couldn’t be found.” The man paused, found a nearby stool to sit on, and rested his wrinkled, worn-out-from-work hands in his lap before continuing.

“That stubborn girl stayed in those woods for ten hours, trying to ignore the feeling in her stomach that screamed viciously for some steaming hot food. Finally, she gave in and trudged to the nearby village. There, she saw a restaurant and stayed, her mouth watering and her eyes wishing. The boss saw this dirty, hungry girl and invited her to a hot bowl of noodle soup. She thanked the kind woman, then devoured the food hungrily. The boss watched the girl with a thoughtful look in her foreseeing dark eyes. When the girl was finished, she cried her thanks again and then proceeded to leave, but the boss stopped her.

“‘Go home and apologize to your mother, and don’t forget to thank her too! Why do you thank me but not your mother? I just gave you a bowl of soup, but your mom has cared for you since you were born. For every single day of your life, she has worried about you.’ The boss gave the girl a warm hug, and the girl hurried home.

“But on her way home, she saw her mom still dressed in her pajamas, looking for her everywhere. With that, the girl broke down and sobbed loudly. Tears streaming down her face, she went over to her mom and apologized. From that day on, she always made sure to thank and appreciate her mom,” the old man finished.

“I believe these two stories are connected. The mom is the moon, never looking for anything in return. The sun is the boss. It’s a metaphor,” he added.

“Wow,” the stranger said, stunned into silence. His eyes watered because he had run away from his mother 35 years ago.

Hello! 👋 It’s nice to meet you. Thanks for being here!

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